Lead - How to Make a Woman Swoon

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Probably we say this elsewhere, but the most important thing isn't all these techniques. They help (a lot), don't get us wrong. But, if you're mean and egocentric, the best embrace in the world won't do much for you.

Be nice. And brave. And it will all work out.

Artist Name:
Horacio Salgán
Song Title:
Don Augustin Bardi
Album Title:
Legends of Tango

(Paraphrased from Wikipedia): Salgán began studying piano at age six. Some of Salgán's most well-known compositions include Del 1 al 5 (Días de pago) (1944), Don Agustín Bardi (1947), Entre tango y tango (1953), Grillito, La llamo silbando, Cortada de San Ignacio, and A fuego lento.

00:05
Leaders, I want to, first, set expectations, and say this chapter, and this series, actually, is about how to make a woman swoon.
00:11
But, realistically, it's going to take more than watching a 3-minute video.
00:16
So, you're going to watch the videos on the embrace, because that's really core.
00:19
You're going to watch this video a gillion times. And you're going to practice a ton.
00:23
And then, once you really get it, it will work marvellously.
00:25
So, they say, to quote, "Put the woman to sleep".
00:28
And it's not really about making her sleep. But, it's about letting there be no interruption.
00:31
So the pressure is very constant. So, I'll hold her gently here. And my pressure won't change suddenly.
00:40
So, as we dance, there's just this even few pounds of pressure on all points of contact.
00:45
D: I don't, for example, say, "Oh, here's nothing. OK, let's go side, OK, let's go back."
N: Oh, I'm not going to like that. I knew I wasn't going to like that.
00:52
So, I'm not, "Bang, bang", sort of, jarring her with changes in pressure. And, instead, I'm keeping it constant,
00:58
And just changing the direction.
01:00
So, I'm holding in with everything. And then, if I want her to go that way, then we move that way.
01:04
But I'm still having this gentle pressure.
01:06
That's point number one. Now, point number two, is that...
01:13
As you lead the follower, I really want you to think that you want to give her time.
01:17
D: So, you're going to wait for her to be ready to move, before you move her to the next thing.
N: Yes. This is a big one.
01:21
D: So, you're going to attend to her.
N: And it's, actually, more complicated than that. Because you want to give her exactly as much time, as she needs.
01:28
And then you go right after she finishes whatever she's doing.
01:31
Using front ochos, as an example.
01:35
I'll go side. I pivot her. I wait for her to finish completely pivoting. And then, I go.
01:40
I pivot her. I wait for her to finish, all the way. And then, I go.
01:45
And, if we did the wrong, it would be this. I go side. I pivot her, OK, let's go! I pivot her, OK, let's go!
01:53
And she's almost ready. But not quite. So, you want to wait for her to finish her movement.
01:57
So, think just those two things. And... OK, we are going to add. I'm going to add the last one.
02:02
D: And it's, sort of, too much. But, you're tough.
N: OK, yeah.
02:06
The final thing. And this is very subtle is the ball of the foot has a lot of width to it.
02:11
Right? So, you can be anywhere on the ball of the foot. Not the ball of the foot - the whole foot. But also, the ball has width.
02:16
So, she can be right here. Or, she can be here. Or here, or here. Or here. On her heel, or on the very tiptoe.
02:24
And so, oftentimes, especially if you're dancing with a woman who's newer, she won't know where to be on the foot.
02:30
And so, she won't find it very easy to pivot, or to take certain kind of steps.
02:34
So, she needs to be... We need to be on the ball of our foot, Iin order to have our axis be very controlled, for pivots, particularly.
02:41
But, if she's not there... Let's say, you're on your heels. So, if she's on her heels...You're good at being on your heels.
02:47
Then, I'll hold her softly, as a leader, and I'll move her softly forward.
02:50
And I'll place her on the ball of that foot, so that it's easier for her to move afterwards.
02:54
So, now, how come that conglomeration of techniques makes a woman swoon? What does it make her feel like?
03:02
So, guys, there's two things. There's one part, which is that you're holding her in a...
03:10
D: Well, you are holding her. Right? People like to be held. So, you're holding her.
N: Some of us really like to be held.
03:14
And, you're holding her in a way... And, because you're using...
03:16
Watched...Because you've watched all those chapters about the embrace, and practiced hard.
03:20
You're using the muscles of your back to hold her. Which makes it feel safe and strong.
03:24
Because my arms are still relaxed and I'm going into her, both with my arms and my mind, it's also attentive and caring.
03:35
And so, there's the strength of the back and the ease of the arms, giving the... helping, enable to love.
03:43
And then, as you dance with her,
03:45
Because you're making sure she's ready to go, before you take them to the next thing, - there's this attentiveness.
03:50
So, you're emoting to her strength, love and attentiveness.
03:54
D: And then...
N: And then, it's such a smooth experience.
03:57
And then, she's just magically going in all these different directions. And she doesn't know how it's happening, but, boy, it's cool.
04:03
And that's the evenness of the pressure and the ball of the foot.
04:05
Sometimes, when I get finished with dancing a dance with David, I have no idea what we did. And I know all the steps, I teach the steps.
04:13
But, it'll just be this incredible, magical experience, that happened.
04:18
And if they ask me afterwards, what was it I was doing - I have no idea.
04:21
It was just this... I almost feel like I'm flying.
04:24
D: Have fun. Practice.
N: Yeah.
Series:
Lead
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Lead