An Intro to Close Embrace - They are Where They Want to Be

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00:00
We're gonna talk a little bit about
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how you hold each other in, well, in general,
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but in particular for close embrace.
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One of the common mistakes is that when I,
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when we hold each other, and I'm gonna show you,
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I'm gonna exaggerate a bit, let me stand on this side.
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Uh, for the leaders of the followers,
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you pull your partner in an uncomfortable way.
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So, ugh, right?
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So there she just that, yeah, she just pulled in
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with her left hand.
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Go for it. Do it slowly. So if you, if she pulled in
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that direction, that's uncomfortable for me.
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Um, and likewise for leaders, it's very common for you
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to pull the follower towards you.
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That's an uncomfortable, so one
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of the general principles is you see where the person stops
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and that's where they want to be.
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It's amazing. They put themselves where they want a miracle.
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And so instead of pulling her towards me
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or pushing her away, for example, with this hand, instead
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of pushing her away, I'm going to find where she is.
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One hand will go on the back, this case in close
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and brief, my chest will go on the front,
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my hand in my chest will meet her.
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You can see that I'm not just,
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um, and so you can say, is the chest and the hand
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or are they going towards each other
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or are they going off direction?
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So for example, if I pull here,
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I'm pulling her torso forward,
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but there's nothing on the other side.
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My chest is down here. It's even more remark market for her.
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She's shorter. That's right. My chest is down there.
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And so if we're here, I'm out of the way.
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She needs to move her hand towards her chest.
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It's this line. That's idea number
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one, is that you want
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to not disturb your partner by not pulling.
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And
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secondly, and this is like aspirational,
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but if you can, you want
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to have the pressure be very even in all places.
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And it's not the actual pressure,
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it's the perceived pressure, which is different.
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So for example, with this open arm, it's very, uh, distal,
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far away from the, from the center line of the body.
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So you push less. Whereas with the hand in the chest,
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you can push a little, but you make it seem like
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everything and not let you hold each other in a very
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comfortable way.